On the way to making big things happen in life, know that you can get there, even if the road looks long and treacherous.

Rome wasn’t built in a day.
Babies aren’t made overnight (well, they are, but not made into a full baby, if you know what I mean).
Businesses don’t take off without the right up front work.

But Rome was built. And babies do grow to full term. And business do grow and thrive.

As you think about what you want to build, create, or grow in your own life, give yourself time. Everything begins as an idea. Plans are made,. Then steps are taken, one at a time.

Once you decide you don’t like your job and want to leave, a new one is unlikely to pop up the next day.

It takes time to think about what’s next.

It takes time for you to hear your true self speak to you and say what he or she wants.

It takes time to then act on those desires.

Give it time. Give it some space. All things can come to you if you truly want them and give them time.

What do you want that’s worth waiting for?
 

A few years ago I abandoned the idea that I needed to have “a successful career.” I don’t mean I don’t want a thriving practice--I do want that. I dropped the idea that career stands separately from who I am. I dropped the idea that career is defined by someone outside of me in corporate America or in some other standardized method.

I began a quest to find out what makes me happy and fills me up. Once I started to get clear on that, the idea of a “successful career” no longer seemed to matter.

In a recent Abraham quote-of-the-day, he suggested the following:

A very good career choice would be to gravitate toward those activities and to embrace those desires that harmonize with your core intentions, which are freedom and growth—and joy. Make a "career" of living a happy life rather than trying to find work that will produce enough income that you can do things with your money that will then make you happy. When feeling happy is of paramount importance to you—and what you do "for a living" makes you happy—you have found the best of all combinations.

I agree.

Create a life that is full of the people and activities you love. Choose the simple pleasures, like a walk after a spring rain and a kiss from your partner. That’s where a happy life starts.

Not in the boardroom or the cubicle (unless you love boardrooms and cubicles).

Fill yourself up to the brim with what makes you happy, and see where that takes you. My bet: you find the success you need most.

What do you think?
 

There is a fine line between persistence and refusing to accept reality. --Tim Leatherman, founder of Leatherman Tools, in reference to his 8 year endeavor to sell his first tool

When I heard Tim Leatherman say these worlds last week to a room full of engineering professionals and students, I grabbed my pen and paper. I don’t think that statement was calculated or prepared; it just flew from his lips when asked a question about frustration and wanting to give up when he hadn’t sold a tool after many years of trying.

I thought about my life. Would I keep working on the same thing for 8 years without a single “bite?” Do I have enough passion and drive and belief in what I do to keep at it that long?

Sometimes we give up because the road to where we’re going gets rough. Other times, we refuse to accept reality even when conditions look bleak.

How do we know if it’s time to quit?

I can’t say I have a clear answer, but one thought comes to mind: if deep in your heart you hear a YES, keep going. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says, if it feels right to you deep down, it’s right.

What do you think?

Photo courtesy of Rebecca via Flickr
 

On Monday I wrote about Evan Lysacek’s comment on loving what he does.

I’m sure 90% of the Olympians fit in this category, and surely all of those who win medals love what they do. I think it would be difficult to win if they didn’t.

Another Olympian that comes to mind when I think of this love is Shaun White.

Not too long ago at the X Games, Sean debuted a fancy new trick he calls the Double McTwist 1260. And he bit it. Big time. If you haven’t seen the video, it’s crazy. (You’ll never catch me doing this sort of thing!)

What happened afterward? He got right back on it and did it again, undeterred. He completed the trick successfully.

Last week, he repeated the trick again and nailed it in the Olympics. No one could come close to matching his score. (For some reason I don’t understand, I can not find his Gold Medal video anywhere online. This source cites a similar experience.) He got the gold.

When Shaun talks about snowboarding, you can feel the love he has for what he does.

When I sit down to do what I do, whether it’s writing or coaching or brainstorming the next thing for my business, I like to tap into the energy that these guys have. The passion. The unwavering commitment. The love. Connected to feelings like those is the way I want to live.
 

You have really great days and you have tough days. I think that if you’re participating in a sport for the right reasons..., when you have those tough days and those trying moments, your love for what you do is going to get you through it.

I was watching some Olympic recaps and heard gold medalists Evan Lysacek say that to Oprah when she asked him “What would you say to the young skaters out there?”

I choose to believe that each one of us can have as much love for what we do in our lives as this man has for his sport. I don’t believe that this love is reserved for Olympic and professional athletes, actors, singers, and Oprah. I think we can all feel this love.

If you’re in a job you don’t love, why are you there? I’m sure you have plenty of logical reasons. How does your heart feel when you spend your days doing something that doesn’t fill you up?

Just for a moment, consider that it is possible to feel the same way Evan does about his “job.” What could you do to make that your reality? Are you willing to take even a tiny step in that direction?

Photo courtesy of dev null via Flickr

Your new identity has been revealed through the hole left from your old identity’s dissolution. You’ve followed the breadcrumbs and spotted your new destination.

You can clearly articulate who you are and what you are to do next.

How are you going to reach your goal?

Map out the steps--every single one. Fill in the blanks. When you’re not sure how to accomplish something or how to get from one step to another, ask for help. Learn new things. Interview experts.

When the picture is clear, it’s time for the real work. It’s time to roll up your sleeves and make things happen. (This is my favorite part!)

Take the first step. Then the next one. The steps can be small (actually, that’s recommended)--no need to leap or try to tackle everything at once.

Learn what you need to along the way.

Fumble and be willing to fail.

Go back and redraw the map where you got it wrong. No one says it will be or has to work perfectly on the first try.

Enjoy watching your dream unfold. You are making it happen.

Photo courtesy of Jasmic via Flickr

Happy 2010 Everyone! Hope you had an enjoyable holiday season.

Do you have a resolution for 2010? How’s it going?

If you received my January 1st newsletter, you learned that my new year’s resolution is to LISTEN. (You can check out a repost of that article on Examiner.com.) While I was contemplating my first blog post of the year, I realized I had already slipped up on my resolution! Alas, all is well.

For me, resolutions are not about a hard, fast, painful commitment to change. Rather, they are like a light that shines on my life to help me find a new way.

It was when I was taking a pre-dinner soak in our hot tub that I realized that I blew my resolution. At the same time, I also realized that it was okay.

Here’s how I lost my way.
I had some inspiration about my coaching business, and I worked up a little frenzy in my office for a good part of the day. The entire time I heard my body talking. It said, “Go exercise!” (I like to exercise--it makes me feel good.) My knee was fussy for some reason I don’t yet understand. My shoulder wanted a break from the computer. I was getting all sorts of loud messages, yet I kept working. So much for LISTENing!

Messing up is perfect.
And even though I didn’t listen, it’s absolutely perfect. Since I have this resolution, I noticed how I was not living the way I want to. Without the resolution, it would have been another day spent working up a storm, minus the awareness. On day three into the new year, I am more aware than before on how LISTEN more in my life.

Slip-ups are okay.
If you have a resolution or a commitment for 2010, stick with it, even if you slip-up. If you plan to lose weight and notice you gain a pound, don’t sweat it! If you set the intention to work less and play more, yet spend a Saturday at the office, no big deal! Slipping up may happen, but it’s no big deal. Notice when you do and why.

Learn from the slip-ups.
When you do slip-up, learn from it and course correct.

For me, two things happened. First, I was excited about my idea, and I can get one-track-minded when that happens. Second, I was coming from a place of “there’s only so much time,” a theme that is common in my life.

What will I do differently next time? I’m not sure, so I will spend some time journaling to figure it out. (This is an old pattern, so a new way is going to take some mental digging!)

Stay with your intention.
Setting an intention to make a change does not mean change will be easy (though sometimes it can be). Give yourself credit for setting a goal, watching yourself along the way, and course correcting when you find yourself off track.

Did you set a resolution for 2010? How’s it going? Share it with us!

p.s. Come back Thursday to hear about my other resolution: ALLOW. And also learn what’s up with my one-word resolutions.
 

Life offers few guarantees.

Some days I wish I had a sure-fire plan to make my life turn out exactly as I want. I bet you have those days, too. Wouldn’t a guarantee on everything be great?

Perfect boss. Dream house. Well-behaved children. Steady income. Luxurious vacations. It would be so easy if they were just guaranteed, wouldn’t it?

Think about it for a moment. If you were six years old and learning addition and you were guaranteed a perfect score on your test, would you keep studying? Some of you may, but not everyone would. If you had a guarantee and stopped studying, you wouldn’t actually learn addition.

If you could be guaranteed that you would study just the perfect thing in college to ensure future success, would you critically evaluate your options? Would you assess your choice along the way to your cap and gown? Once out in the world, would you continue to check your career progress against your true desires?

If you were guaranteed that your business would succeed if you did A and B and C, how would you learn that G is a more enjoyable way to grow your business? And that P was a great thing to do for personal growth, as well as for business profit?

Whenever we take something for granted or consider it to be guaranteed, we turn off our brain. We stop learning, experimenting, questioning, and evaluating. We stop growing.

If someone gave me a simple formula for success, I would likely follow the formula like a robot, doing just what they said. I would blindly move in the direction of their guarantee, because it would be easier than figuring it out on my own.

Part of me would love a success formula that would guarantee my future success as a coach. It would alleviate the pressure, stress, and anxiety that stepping out on my own has brought to the surface. I could relax and just do what I love: coach and write. I could avoid all of the uncomfortable parts, like marketing and selling. I would also miss out on a heck of a lot of personal growth that those things are currently bringing to me.

If I had to guess, the best success formula anyone could give me would look like this:

experimentation + persistence = a good chance of getting what I want

That’s what life’s about. Taking chances, experimenting, persisting. There is no magic formula for success. There are no guarantees. There’s hard work, trying new things, failing, and trying again.

So what are the two steps to guaranteed success? Try and try again.

I can’t tell you exactly what to do to achieve your goals. I can guide you, offer ideas, help you find your own answers, find where you’re holding yourself back, support you through trial and error, and celebrate your successes. I can tell you that you can eventually get what you want when you keep at it.

What goal are you wanting to reach with a guarantee? Are you ready to experiment and persist?

Keep at it. You’ll get there.